YASMIN'S REVISION ON ALINA'S work
ALINA'S WORK
I decided to write a "prequel” to A Brown Girl Dead, and represent the life of the girl before she had gone to heaven. My piece of writing also has two stanzas,but it does not follow the abab rhyme scheme. The literary devices that are present include metaphors, personification and rhyming.
Cullen has put an emphasis on things that represented purity such as “white roses” (Line 1) and that she was seen as “sweet” (Line 4). I, on the other hand, put the aspect of purity into another perspective and represented it as the barrier for happiness as being pure to me is being naive. What is the point of being so innocent when you’re taken advantage of and are “unappreciated” (Alina line 5). When you are placed on the lowest niche of the society, does your inner self even matter or make a difference.
The metaphor “Her heart is alive, her soul is dead” (Alina lines 1 and 2) is supposed to send the audience a message that portrays the girl’s state of mind: Although, she is alive, "the misery” (Alina line 3) of her life kills her soul. Back again to purity, which “overcomes the dark thoughts” (Alina line 6), it was a perfect moment to interpret a personification into the stanza, since as I previously mentioned, the naivety, may sometimes push you away from the reality. The rhyme scheme of the poem I created is abccabcd, which is different from the original, but it was not in my plans to give the audience the feeling of rhyme being meaningful.
It was fascinating to get deeper into the meaning of the Harlem Renaissance poetry, as I am not familiar with it as much as with the European society of that time. Most of the African-American poets during the 1920s wrote about their tough life experiences in their poems, yet it was strange to come to a thought that all of our life encounters are the same no matter what race you are, even though it was “up to the dominant” (line 8), who were the white people.
I decided to write a "prequel” to A Brown Girl Dead, and represent the life of the girl before she had gone to heaven. My piece of writing also has two stanzas,but it does not follow the abab rhyme scheme. The literary devices that are present include metaphors, personification and rhyming.
Cullen has put an emphasis on things that represented purity such as “white roses” (Line 1) and that she was seen as “sweet” (Line 4). I, on the other hand, put the aspect of purity into another perspective and represented it as the barrier for happiness as being pure to me is being naive. What is the point of being so innocent when you’re taken advantage of and are “unappreciated” (Alina line 5). When you are placed on the lowest niche of the society, does your inner self even matter or make a difference.
The metaphor “Her heart is alive, her soul is dead” (Alina lines 1 and 2) is supposed to send the audience a message that portrays the girl’s state of mind: Although, she is alive, "the misery” (Alina line 3) of her life kills her soul. Back again to purity, which “overcomes the dark thoughts” (Alina line 6), it was a perfect moment to interpret a personification into the stanza, since as I previously mentioned, the naivety, may sometimes push you away from the reality. The rhyme scheme of the poem I created is abccabcd, which is different from the original, but it was not in my plans to give the audience the feeling of rhyme being meaningful.
It was fascinating to get deeper into the meaning of the Harlem Renaissance poetry, as I am not familiar with it as much as with the European society of that time. Most of the African-American poets during the 1920s wrote about their tough life experiences in their poems, yet it was strange to come to a thought that all of our life encounters are the same no matter what race you are, even though it was “up to the dominant” (line 8), who were the white people.
YASMIN'S REVISION
Transparent Soul is a “A Brown Girl Dead” prequel, preceding the death of the girl Countee Cullen mentioned in his poem. This is created to elaborate the traits of the girl, concurrently questions the story behind her death. The quintessence of prior knowledge, prominence of purity and eloquence of literary devices within the original poem has echoed through “Transparent Soul” as to resonate the essence I was able to capture.
Most of the African-American poets during the 1920s wrote about their tough life experiences in their poems, resulting in the new consciousness within the white population in the American society. Countee Cullen, being one of these poets, tends to write his poem in the perspective of the African Americans, integrating insinuations towards a central idea he has in mind. In “A Brown Girl Dead” he brought up a thought that all of our life encounters are the same, no matter what race we are, even though, at the time, it was “up to the dominant” (Alina line 8), who were the white people. Rather than just revealing substantial amount of the discriminations faced by the black people, he simply showed it in the word “brown” in the title of his poem. One simple indication of the race of the girl dramatically changed the meaning of the poem which is how I chose to use the word “dominant” in my poem, as it conjures the concept of injustice. Cullen then contrasts the poem with purity which dilutes the negative connotations that it has, such as the absence of life and what happens afterwards.
Purity can be seen in various ways. Cullen chose to put an emphasis on purity through his “white roses” (Line 1) and “sweet” descriptions of the girl (Line 4) in order to contrast the poem, between death and purity. I chose to integrate purity in a different way as I view purity as a barrier for happiness since to me, purity is naivety. Since the girl is described as pure in Cullen’s poem, it can be taken into account that she has not been touched by the cynicism of the world, thus, showing the naivety she possess. What is the point of being so innocent when you’re taken advantage of and are “unappreciated” (Alina line 5). When you are placed on the lowest niche of the society, does your inner self even matter or make a difference? These questions are the incentives to why I see purity as naivety. It complements my poem rather than contrasting it, in this process of interpretation. However, my full interpretation of the poem would not be complete without some literary counterparts such as the literary devices.
Literary devices within “Transparent Soul” include metaphors, personification and rhyming which is quite similar to “A Brown Girl Dead”. The metaphor “her heart is alive, her soul is dead” (Alina lines 1 and 2) portrays the girl’s state of mind: Although, she is alive, "the misery” (Alina line 3) of her life, kills her soul. This foreshadows the state of the girl in the “A Brown Girl Dead” alongside it’s metaphor of “lay her out in white” (line 6). Cullen uses Death to “found her sweet” (line 4) embodying death’s ability to taste much alike my poem of which purity’s ability to conquer and “overcomes the dark thoughts” (Alina line 6). It personifies my notion of purity, where naivety, may sometimes push you away from the reality, where you are constantly enveloped by dark thoughts. Instead of using the same rhyme of abab, I created a poem with a rhyme scheme of abcc abcd, to show the change of tone between the two stanzas. Then, if both poems, are read one after another, the tone would change due to its difference in context.
Evidently, I had interpreted and compared both the similarity and differences in the poem to show the potential qualities, “Transparent Soul” has to be a backstory to “A Brown Girl Dead”. It could be seen through the significant background knowledge, concept of purity and the adept power of literary devices. These components not only contrasted the both poems but it harmonized them as well which creates the ideal ambience for a poem like this.
Transparent Soul is a “A Brown Girl Dead” prequel, preceding the death of the girl Countee Cullen mentioned in his poem. This is created to elaborate the traits of the girl, concurrently questions the story behind her death. The quintessence of prior knowledge, prominence of purity and eloquence of literary devices within the original poem has echoed through “Transparent Soul” as to resonate the essence I was able to capture.
Most of the African-American poets during the 1920s wrote about their tough life experiences in their poems, resulting in the new consciousness within the white population in the American society. Countee Cullen, being one of these poets, tends to write his poem in the perspective of the African Americans, integrating insinuations towards a central idea he has in mind. In “A Brown Girl Dead” he brought up a thought that all of our life encounters are the same, no matter what race we are, even though, at the time, it was “up to the dominant” (Alina line 8), who were the white people. Rather than just revealing substantial amount of the discriminations faced by the black people, he simply showed it in the word “brown” in the title of his poem. One simple indication of the race of the girl dramatically changed the meaning of the poem which is how I chose to use the word “dominant” in my poem, as it conjures the concept of injustice. Cullen then contrasts the poem with purity which dilutes the negative connotations that it has, such as the absence of life and what happens afterwards.
Purity can be seen in various ways. Cullen chose to put an emphasis on purity through his “white roses” (Line 1) and “sweet” descriptions of the girl (Line 4) in order to contrast the poem, between death and purity. I chose to integrate purity in a different way as I view purity as a barrier for happiness since to me, purity is naivety. Since the girl is described as pure in Cullen’s poem, it can be taken into account that she has not been touched by the cynicism of the world, thus, showing the naivety she possess. What is the point of being so innocent when you’re taken advantage of and are “unappreciated” (Alina line 5). When you are placed on the lowest niche of the society, does your inner self even matter or make a difference? These questions are the incentives to why I see purity as naivety. It complements my poem rather than contrasting it, in this process of interpretation. However, my full interpretation of the poem would not be complete without some literary counterparts such as the literary devices.
Literary devices within “Transparent Soul” include metaphors, personification and rhyming which is quite similar to “A Brown Girl Dead”. The metaphor “her heart is alive, her soul is dead” (Alina lines 1 and 2) portrays the girl’s state of mind: Although, she is alive, "the misery” (Alina line 3) of her life, kills her soul. This foreshadows the state of the girl in the “A Brown Girl Dead” alongside it’s metaphor of “lay her out in white” (line 6). Cullen uses Death to “found her sweet” (line 4) embodying death’s ability to taste much alike my poem of which purity’s ability to conquer and “overcomes the dark thoughts” (Alina line 6). It personifies my notion of purity, where naivety, may sometimes push you away from the reality, where you are constantly enveloped by dark thoughts. Instead of using the same rhyme of abab, I created a poem with a rhyme scheme of abcc abcd, to show the change of tone between the two stanzas. Then, if both poems, are read one after another, the tone would change due to its difference in context.
Evidently, I had interpreted and compared both the similarity and differences in the poem to show the potential qualities, “Transparent Soul” has to be a backstory to “A Brown Girl Dead”. It could be seen through the significant background knowledge, concept of purity and the adept power of literary devices. These components not only contrasted the both poems but it harmonized them as well which creates the ideal ambience for a poem like this.
YASMIN'S ESSAY
Purity versus naivety is a battle between the innocent and the clueless. Both have the same meaning but different connotations. In my peers' Alina Sitnik's analysis on her poem called transparent soul, we can see how her ideas affect my revisions. Even though both of our works have the same meaning, it gives a different tone.
First of all, Alina's poem is chosen out of all the other exemplary works is due to her authenticity to remain true to her opinions and herself. She has this notion that purity is naivety where by being pure you are naive in a way that you ignore the world. Other than that, she has supported her beliefs with questions that requires deep thinking such as "when you are placed on the lowest niche of the society, does your inner self even matter or make a difference?" revealing the thoughts she has regarding this matter. Her subtlety in supporting is admirable since instead of making it obvious, she used a covert way to show her interpretation by not directly quoting her intentions, but, leading us to figure it out. However, there were details that were left out in the process, where, I try to patch it up and fill in the missing information.
I've made changes to her work not in a way that changed the meaning of her analysis but more of a support and becoming the meat to the bone. She had points that could be elaborated and in which I wrote and added in for her. This is evident in my clarification in her intentions of the prequel. She states that she is writing it, but, she fails to mention her motivation. I then, added it in with a precise reason why in the first lines of the first paragraph. I figured this out based on her points in her other paragraphs. Other than that, you could see it in my revision, where I tied it back to the assignment where certain factors have to be incorporated. For example, the assignment was to have a connection to the 1920s Harlem, in the first paragraph of my revision, I had included more information as to fit the requirement. An assignment without requirements, is not an assignment, especially in an analysis like this.
Through this analysis, I have realised that I learned how to accept others opinion by revising Alina's work multiple times. I had to also analyse her work to see what her thoughts are. I also had to reread and also figure out what she is trying to say. This required a lot of thinking and time which is vital to learning. I wouldn't be able to revise her work without time and thought. By having an open mindset to her ideas, I was able to understand and revised her work with ease. There are so many things I have acquired through this revision and analysis, one of them is perspective.
From Alina's analysis, I have learned the opinions of others and agreeing with it even though it wasn't something you would've thought of. She had a different but strong perspective, which I had to write about and support. Instead of going against that idea and opinion, I respected it, and chose to put myself in her shoes. It created this sense of an alternate self within me.
Purity versus naivety is a battle between the innocent and the clueless. Both have the same meaning but different connotations. In my peers' Alina Sitnik's analysis on her poem called transparent soul, we can see how her ideas affect my revisions. Even though both of our works have the same meaning, it gives a different tone.
First of all, Alina's poem is chosen out of all the other exemplary works is due to her authenticity to remain true to her opinions and herself. She has this notion that purity is naivety where by being pure you are naive in a way that you ignore the world. Other than that, she has supported her beliefs with questions that requires deep thinking such as "when you are placed on the lowest niche of the society, does your inner self even matter or make a difference?" revealing the thoughts she has regarding this matter. Her subtlety in supporting is admirable since instead of making it obvious, she used a covert way to show her interpretation by not directly quoting her intentions, but, leading us to figure it out. However, there were details that were left out in the process, where, I try to patch it up and fill in the missing information.
I've made changes to her work not in a way that changed the meaning of her analysis but more of a support and becoming the meat to the bone. She had points that could be elaborated and in which I wrote and added in for her. This is evident in my clarification in her intentions of the prequel. She states that she is writing it, but, she fails to mention her motivation. I then, added it in with a precise reason why in the first lines of the first paragraph. I figured this out based on her points in her other paragraphs. Other than that, you could see it in my revision, where I tied it back to the assignment where certain factors have to be incorporated. For example, the assignment was to have a connection to the 1920s Harlem, in the first paragraph of my revision, I had included more information as to fit the requirement. An assignment without requirements, is not an assignment, especially in an analysis like this.
Through this analysis, I have realised that I learned how to accept others opinion by revising Alina's work multiple times. I had to also analyse her work to see what her thoughts are. I also had to reread and also figure out what she is trying to say. This required a lot of thinking and time which is vital to learning. I wouldn't be able to revise her work without time and thought. By having an open mindset to her ideas, I was able to understand and revised her work with ease. There are so many things I have acquired through this revision and analysis, one of them is perspective.
From Alina's analysis, I have learned the opinions of others and agreeing with it even though it wasn't something you would've thought of. She had a different but strong perspective, which I had to write about and support. Instead of going against that idea and opinion, I respected it, and chose to put myself in her shoes. It created this sense of an alternate self within me.